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How many of you can relate to family drama over the Holiday’s? Oh my, is it hard. High expectations, the food, the fake smiles, the people you don’t want to be around. Or how about the fact that maybe you are asked the same questions fifteen times. “How are you?” “How is business?” “What’s new with your family this year?” “Do you have any big plans for the holiday’s?” You can string together the answers that people want to hear for a while. But eventually you get tired of answering the need to know info, and what people want to hear.

There is nothing better than getting together with the ones you love, the ones you really care about. After all, without these family members, you wouldn’t have family. You work so hard for them all year long, for what, a sweater, and a turkey dinner. It is hard to slow down, and really connect with people. You come from similar backgrounds, but your paths are different now.

Sometimes, I feel like those paths cross, and other times, I feel like we couldn’t be farther away.

I want badly for the family time to be worth it, to be remembered and cherished. But it seems the older I get the tougher my skin gets, and the less childish I become. So we do it for the kids. Of course. The grandkids, and the kids have hope, so we should hope in them, that they won’t have the same struggles, and family dilemmas that we have. I will give them a better life, a better opportunity.

This sounds so negative, I mean come on, I love my family. All of it. The good, the bad, the ugly. It just seems that, if I am involved, there is mess to be made, and not much cleaning up. I don’t agree with them, so therefore, I am the bad guy. So what do we do…we put on the smile, we say hello, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and shut your mouth. 

Well, what if you got out of your fast pace ways, and actually had planned Christmas presents and dinner? What if weeks before you got together, you started texting, and calling the ones you will see, and bring up a past funny memory? What if you were not the burden with your sports needs to be met, and actually started being compassionate to others? What if your hugs gripped a little longer than usual. What if you got down on your knees and said hello to the little ones on their level? I believe you have it in you. I believe if you talk to your spouse, parents, siblings, and told them how glad you were to see them, and genuinely connected with them on topics they are interested in, I believe you can avoid the drama, and actually start some new holiday traditions. Which I guess brings me to the close of this post. Here is to next year!

Matt Zappasodi

Author Matt Zappasodi

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